IF ONLY IN HER DREAMS
By Antoinette Denise Johnson
Could she surrender to love,
that is deeply manifested from the soul?
Or remain damaged sinking into a bottomless hole?
A black pit which swirls and twirls,
as she flips and dips,
holding on to her nothingness.
As she parts her lips,
yearning to speak......
Though not even a whisper is heard.
Eyes wide open, yet blind to the love being offered.
She remains a fragile, damaged broken child,
seeking, searching, yearning to be whole!
Desperately wanting to know what it feels like.
To behold,
A childhood that remains a vague blur
Of happier times.....
Though she knows deep within her mind
They did exist.
Pictures don’t lie.
She’s seen them a million times,
Yet they seem to be of someone else,
Of another place and time,
Not of herself.
She wore a mask from an early age......
shared her secrets with her diary page.
Could she ever learn to trust again,
After being fooled by man after man?
The first man she ever loved left,
And married someone else.
She was only twelve,
But still,
She blamed herself.
She didn’t feel loved.
Not like before.
She just felt like Daddy
Didn’t love her anymore!
But time went by,
Days became years
Filled with laughter,
Pain and tears.
All is forgiven now.
Her parents are both gone.
Grateful she was able to renew
That precious bond.
But........
Could she surrender to love,
That is deeply manifested
From the soul?
Or remain damaged,
Sinking into a bottomless hole?
I don’t know!
That remains to be seen.
Maybe she’ll surrender....
“ If only in her dreams.”
By Antoinette Denise Johnson
“4realpoetess”
Copyright © 2011
All Rights Reserved
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